Easiest Egg Pattern Ever

It’s that time of the year. The ice shelves are breaking up and the ever-present cold wind gives way to the trickle of running water. Other than the occasional crocus peeking through the snow and the moans of allergy sufferers, increased fish activity give us an indication that winter will soon be over. It’s also spring spawn time, and egg patterns can be effective producers. Are you looking to tie the easiest egg pattern this side of the Mississippi (or maybe even both sides)? This pattern probably ranks in the top 10 as the easiest fly pattern to master. All you need are plastic beads, a few hooks, Loon UV Knot Sense, and a beer.

Step 1: Open a beer and round up some hooks. Umpqua U501 hooks in #6 or #8 work great. You can alternatively use just about any scud or nymph hook with a decent gap. A pair of pliers are always useful for tweaking the proper gap when necessary.

Step 2: Raid your kid’s art supplies to scrounge up a few plastic beads that might pass off as a fish egg. No kids? Go down to the closest hobby store and plunder their craft bins. In a flash you could mimic a salmon egg, rainbow or cutthroat egg sac, or even mountain whitefish roe.

Step 3: Here’s the most difficult part, place a nice glob of UV Knot Sense on the hook, slide it over the hook, and then shine the Loon UV light on the bead for a few seconds. Finally, drink your beer.

Yep, that’s pretty much it. What the hell did you think it was gonna be? You could be completely shit-faced drunk and still pull off a dozen of these killer flies in a half an hour. So, get ‘er done.

Live Every Day As If It Were Your Last

Live every day as if it were your last and then some day you’ll be right.  ~H.H. “Breaker” Morant

Steal Like An Artist

Steal Like An Artist is a manifesto for creativity in the digital age.

I love the manifesto. I have not read the book, but it’s definitely on my short list.

My Latest Obsession

I love to make shit. For me, there’s nothing more satisfying than making something with your own two hands. When I step back to take a look at whatever I’ve created, I revel in the fact that it didn’t come from some damn factory where the maker didn’t give a crap about who would actually consume it. It wasn’t bought. It wasn’t made in a foreign country. It probably didn’t cost that much to make. It wasn’t mass-produced, and, for all I care, it may be impossible to reproduce. It doesn’t need a warranty. I know exactly what’s in it. And, it is actually something I’ll use.

What is it?

Hell, it could be anything – carpentry, metal work, a website, a new painting, a tasty meal, or climbing gear (yeah, I used to make my own climbing gear).

Right now, it’s beer.

A Belgian-style Blonde Ale

I made my first homebrew almost twenty years ago. It was bad. I was a college student, and, like school, I didn’t take brewing too seriously. In my defense, a homebrewer did not have the resources available today to make great tasting beer. Still, I wasn’t motivated to do much of anything aside from chasing girls, rock climbing, cycling, or fishing.

Oh my, how times have changed. Nowadays, there seems to be an almost inexhaustible supply of quality resources available to the homebrewer – books, equipment, and ingredients. I’m pretty much obsessed. On Monday, I’ll start my third batch in less than two months.

By the way, if you have any empty beer bottles, send ’em my way. I’ll be bottling something next week.

Oak Aged Arrogant Bastard (clone). Here you have mildly oaked, heavy oaked, and fermenting oak tree.